The Reddit Worst Baby Names Roll Call

If you’re stuck on which baby name will be the best fit for your lil’ bundle, this list should at least give you a good idea of what not to call your child.

baby names

Or any child, for that matter.

Courtesy of a popular Reddit thread; check out the worst baby names around, as voted by commenters — if your first choice of moniker happens to be among them, don’t tell anyone. Ever.

First up is Elizabreth, a name the submitting commenter succinctly sums up as the near-phonetic equivalent of “lizard breath.”

On the subject of messing with classics, thread users explain that it’s not necessarily the name itself that’s the problem, but the pretentious (read: ridiculous) way parents choose to spell it. Common names currently being fed through the shredder include Amy, Billy and Melanie —AmeeBillee and Melanee.

Punctuated by a torrent of expletives, one incredulous commenter rants:
“In almost all interactions, it doesn’t matter how it’s spelled, because you’re just saying the name. But then when it does matter, it’s a hassle to all involved, with no benefit whatsoever.”

The list of offending titles goes on to include out Aliviyah (pronounced like Olivia – really) and Ehann (pronounced like Ian).

Oh, and then there’s Mhavryck. Pronunciation: Maverick.

Of course, there will always be those nefarious nametags which shouldn’t be bestowed upon anyone, no matter the incarnation; like Little SweetmeatBabyDangerBeberley and

Let’s not forget double-barrel Olive Garden, or Spatula.

Found anything you like yet?