Why UK mums won’t leave babies with someone else

The first time that a mum leaves her baby with someone else, it’s going to be difficult. It should get a little easier the second time round and then the more you do it, the more okay you’ll feel – right?

Wrong.

A new survey, commissioned by Cussons Mum & Me, has revealed that a quarter of mums will not leave their baby with another person until babs is around 8 months old.

And when babs is left with someone else, 88 per cent of mums call home to check on the baby not just once but up to SIX times. More than 50 per cent of mums feel guilty about leaving their babies, 11 per cent are tearful when doing so and 30 per cent of mums cannot relax when out without their baby.

But why?

Well, we feel guilty. And the reason we feel guilty is because the person that is charged with the task of looking after such precious cargo – whether it’s granny, aunty or a sitter – is not mum.

No one does as good a job as mum. Which is true. But the thing is, dear mums, our babies will one day grow up and leave. We have to live our lives as wives, friends, daughters, colleagues, leaders… all that we may be, in preparation for that day.

We’re allowed to go out and have fun without our children. We’re also allowed to feel a little awkward doing so but the way to confront fear is to face it head on. Be real about your worries but challenge your guilt by knowing that it is irrational and defy it by going on a hot date with your man anyway.

The best way to ease into leaving your babs with someone else is to choose the person you trust most to look after your baby those first few times; someone who knows your parenting style and knows your baby.

Talk to your partner about how you feel and let him support you by rationalising your anxiety.

Dads are a fabulous antidote to the hyper-emotion that can afflict mums at any given moment. I totally rely on my husband to keep me a rational mum and in the same vein he respects my mummy instinct, and so we make a great team.

A team that goes out alone a whole lot less than before our girls but when we get the opportunity, boy do we grab it!

When was the first time you left your baby with someone else? Was it difficult?

Source: “Prima Baby & Pregnancy”: February, p71-72